Munirah Meerasa

Struggles Of Being A Tall Girl Sometimes being tall and female can be a struggle. For example, people seem to be of the opinion that girls should be short and fragile, mostly due to sexist ideologies. And in addition, sometimes it feels like every single clothing and shoes company is against you. What's a girl to do? Well, find other people who relate! Here are some of the struggles that a lot of tall girls can relate to: People commenting on your height. Whether it be just “Wow, you’re taller than I expected!” or “How’s the weather up there?”, there are no shortage of comments when a girl is tall! Having to stand in the back of group photos. When people say “let’s take a group picture!”, you automatically flock to the back. It’s become a reflex at this point. Low ceilings. As if you needed another reason to feel tall (and possibly hit your head). High fives with shorter people. Having to lower your arm/make them reach higher up is always a struggle. Being the ...

I wish i can say that, I wish, me before was this was happy and have an exiting life. But oh no, i don't. Most of my childhood memories is gone. Not just faded, but gone completely. Its like those memories is force out from my brain. Yeah, if i sums up what my "memory" was like, i can assume that it quite traumatizing. How i know? From stories that my mother sometimes tell me. Because i don't remember any of it. I consciously create image in my brain imagine how it would be based on the stories that she told me about. How bad i was bullied, How terrified i was, to talk to basically anyone. How i so afraid of my kindergarten assistant that one time i spill my soup on the floor during snack time. i wipe the floor using my own uniform because i afraid of what she would do to me if she find out about it. How i would stare at the ceiling of my mother bedroom thinking what it would be if i am braver that i am. How could i make them repay what they did to me. Okay...

I've know how short my memory span is, but strangely i can't remember 90% of my childhood. Most of the things i remember now probably a make up scenarios or make up scene from what my mother stories. Like how i was lefties when i start to write. I swap writing using right hand because my dad being superstitious he is he would scold me when he sees me using left hand. "Because it was dirty." I don't blame him though, because i don't remember this myself. Only what i mother told me about. But i kind of wish that i didn't stop from using left hand entirely. Still salty about it. side note i always write with right hand and do other stuff with left hand. at the time i  thought i'm just weird. hahahah. Also when my class mate told me that my handwriting used to be so neat. i was like. wtf. My handwriting was horrible. It still does. well i don't ever remember that i once had neat handwriting. I could go on and on about this, but my point is. Now ...

So last night before go to bed. My sister closed the bedroom door leaving our house cats inside. And this morning she wake up earlier than me because of a stink smell. Because it is sunday i wake up around 10.30 am, and the first things she say to me was, "didn't you smell that? i woke up super early to that smell and furiously searching for that smell, i think kiwi (our cat) poop inside this room."  Half awake i sit up straight. "The fuck...she really did!" i am fully awake when i finally smell it. That whole day i keep going back to look for that poop. Finally i lost it, when i can't even stay more than 5 seconds in my bed while my sister were chilling on her bad not smelling that scent. I manage to find my mother face mask and with that i shout dramatically to my younger sister, "imma find this shit." because of my bed took half the room with my 3 bucket of laundry and everything. i decide it could have been at my place. so i start to cle...

Dear best friend, I want to say that i am sorry. Sorry for lying to you. When you ask me. About my day. I said its fine. I lied. When you ask me. How are you feeling. I said im feeling alright. I lied. When you ask me, did i had lunch. I said im done. I lied. When you ask me. Did i sleep well. I said yeah like a baby. I lied. Im sorry for sugarcoat everything that going on in my day. I lied to you. How can i tell the truth when i dont feel alright. I hate wake up in the morning feeling anxious to face my day. Im afraid to face people that i put on that resting bitch face. I take longer route to avoid small talks. How to i tell you that even a cup of coffee and biscuits feel like lunch. How do i tell you that in my head i dont care about eating. Feel like starving myself is the normal thing to do. How do i tell you that it take min 2 hrs for me to fall asleep and wake up in the middle of the night sweating for that simple thing but for me enough to agitate me. How do i te...

Haha.  Bajet ja kan.  Tapi kan terkenang jgk msa aq bwak moto nie macam2 jadi.  Paling common serangga.  Aq nie memang dah fobia dengan binatang kecik tuh.  Ad lah sekali tuh aq bwak ats highway nk balik.  Selalu jadi mcm nie time aq on the way nk balik lah.  Jlan lengang lah x bnyak keta.  Aq pun tengah laju.  Sekali aq nmpak dari jauh kat ekor mata. Bulat kecik ja dk terbang tala kt aq.  Aq mcm ignore tp seconds aq sedar  dah terlambat.  Ditakdirkan haluan dia dan aku bersilang. Tung!!  Mcm begegar helmet aq nie benda tuh langgar.  X jelas species apa or even menatang apa dia langgar visor aq dgn kedudukan kening kiri aq nie.  Dan euh klau aq ckap.  Dia tinggalkan kesan.  Well tau dak apa jadi klau kumbang kena pijak??  Erm mcm tuh lah.  Lendir dia lekat kt visor helmet aq.  Hahahaah.  Tekejut aq slow skit moto tuh.  I do feel bad for that thing.  I mean its life ...

Tanpa aku duga hati aq nie boleh pulak lah terpaut dkt teman sekerja aq nie. And kali nie pun kes dia bukan kerna rupa. Klau nak ukur hensem dia memang kelaut lah. Tapi manisnya ad. Hehe. And kenapa boleh ter...ter...nie. aq pun x sedar. Yang aq tau. Aq da start rasa x best bila prempuan lain flirt ngan dia. Rasa panas jaa. Then kalau kena kerja sekali aq boleh fukus bkan x leh. Rasa tenang ja. Haih susah nak habaq. I cant really put my finger on the things i like about him. Tapi masa aq cuti lama tuh hari first nak g keja msa ondaway tuh. Tanpa sengaja aq jenguk ke line depan masa tnggu kt trafic light. Skali nmpak helmet hitam and sweater adidas hijau. Mana ad org lain pkai mcm tuh. Dia jaa. Jantung aq masa tuh macam kena sambar petir. Hahaha. Gila kan. Ahh. Skali dia bwak slow pulak. Aq yg memang dk bwak laju nie dah kedepan. Ish nk potong dia ka x? Last aq blah mcm tuh ja ptg dia. Lalu sebelah pulak tuh. Yg pelik nya msa sblm kami rapat lg. Aq daa perasan daa sweater dia yg d...

Well i was cleaning my things and i found my old stash of bus ticket. well i had his habit of keeping the bus ticket i ever rode in my purse. well long story shot.  last year around November i need to get home from Subang. as i only travel by instinct not logic. i decide to take bus at pudu sentral which i always go to.  for almost four year. arrive with my white uniform white shawl. black pants and shoe. (lucky i dint wear those sport shoe yet that time. lol) i do what i does normally. with handbag and luggage that could fit me in. and the handle broken. can you imagine the state i  that time. looking ragged, i don't really care how my face or my entire outfit look like at that time i walk around act like it was fab. while there a ink stain on my white shirt.  i went to the second floor with elevator dragging my luggage with one thing in mind. to get the quickest bus that leaving withing half an hour. aS fast as i can. as soon as the elevator opens. (th...

Jadi leader nie bukan senang. apatah lg klau nk kena monitor keja orang len. kadang nak bebai pun ada. suruh satu benda. pagi smpai ptg. smpaikan kena bg date line. sblm pkui brapa bleh siap. kita kata A. A lah jadi. bg cmtuh. camtuh lah siap bg blek kt kita. sikap memahami tuh kena ad. sebab x semua orang bleh capai level yg kita expect kt orang tuh. cara bt kerja orang nie x sama. ada yang cepat tangkap. ada yg dak. and lagi punah. klau hang bg task nie. then dua jam berlalu. apa pn x bt. sbb "alamak lupa." sabar kena tebal. itu lah kerja ngan orang. sabar. sabar. sabar. bila kita kena jawab ngan bos. tapi kerja tuh anak buah yg bt. and depa bt mka blur last skali.... "munirah banyak kali dah saya pesan...." dan kau pun angguk kerana kau orang lama. kau dah tau kerja nie. and aitomatik kau kena tanggung semua kerja yang berlungguk tuh. suma kena cover. takat nie aq anggap nie cabaran. bagi aq grow. yelah pengalaman. so kau pun kan nk grow srang. kau...

Episode 1 Ira membetulkan cermin mata hitamnya dihadapan cahaya kamera diluar pintu mahkamah. Dia melangkah tenang menuju ke keretanya. Wartawan yang kelihatan begitu teruja mengambil gambarnya serta soalan diatanya. "Maaf no comment." azfar mengangkat tangannya isyarat kepada jurugambar yang menghalang laluannya. "Ira balik sorang. Assalamualaikum." tanpa menoleh ke arah ibunya dia masuk kedalam keretanya tanpa reaksi.  Puan sofia hanya memandang lemah kereta anaknya yang berlalu pergi. "Jomlah kita balik."puan sofia mengangguk ke arah suaminya. Dan berpaling menujuk ke kereta mereka sebelum berhenti apabila terpandang kan Izham menantunya yang sedang bercakap dengan peguam nya. Izham berpaling dan pandangan nya bertaut dengan puan sofia. Tanpa reaksi dia memakai kembali cermin matanya dan masuk kedalam keretanya. July 2015 "Cantik anak mak. Dah jadi bini orang dah. Hah jagan duk buat perangai bangun tegahari hari cuti. Dah ad suam...

Marriage................ One thing Hundred of other thing to keep in mind like poffft i know... Anyway can i just say that it suck.  Completely.

Keep everything low key. Not everyone can agree with you and that okay. You wasn't born to satisfy others while breaking your own heart. If its feels wrong. Leave it. Always trust your instinct. Carefully select people who you share personal things with. Never say yes when your heart says no.

Selasa. Sedang aku berjalan ke arah pejabat di hujung kawasan produksi. Aku menjenguk cuba melihat menerusi cermin siapa yang berada didalam pejabat. Beberapa langkah sebelum sampai dia sudah terlihat aku sedang berjalan ke arahnya. Walaupun disebalik 'Face Mask' yang menutupi sebahagian dari wajahnya aku dapat melihat dia tersenyum teruja sambil melambai tangan ke arah aku. Sebaik sahaja pintu pejabat aku tolak buka dia berdiri mengalu-alukan kedatangan aku. "Hai....ish susahnya laa nak nampak la nie. sibuk aih, naik rindu aih." Terpana seketika namun aku hanya tersenyum. dan terus kepada tujuan aku, "Ada lagi tak tempat kosong kat sini. dengan komputer yang tak bertuan?" Dengan semangat yang tiba-tiba datang entah dari mana dia terus ke komputer sekeliling meja nya dan melihat number siri di belakang 'CPU' "Nah nah tengok kat sini. " aku tahan rasa geli hati. "bukan laa saya nie nak cari tempat duduk." "haih! Aw...